Todd's Prayer

Printer-friendly versionPrinter-friendly version

Todd’s Prayer

Author’s note: This is based on my real experiences growing up. Its intense, so reader discretion is advised.

“No more, please ....”

I lay in my bed, weeping and praying,  just like I did every night.

Every single night.

“Make it stop. God, please, make it stop.”

I looked at my headboard, and for the millionth time considered ramming my head into it until I fell unconscious.  Maybe I could bash this stuff out of my brain .....

“I cant do this anymore...please.”

Its a good thing I’m just about invisible, or the lack of sleep and constant crying would get someone to ask questions.

But nobody asks.

Not that I would have an answer if they did.

“Please....”

“I’ll be good boy, God. I want to be a good boy.  I’m so tired...”

“Just ...please.”

“I dont want to sin. I dont want to go to hell. Please help me....”

“God I’m begging.”

“Please make it so I can stop. Take it from me.”

“Please make me stop wanting to be a girl.”